Why I Don't Watch [American] Sports

Let's start with my most hated sport: American Football.

Aside from the fact that the ball touches a foot perhaps 1% of the entire game, the moral character of many of the players are not only disgusting, but heinous. Yet they're still in the NFL. Michael Vick? Okay, you did your time and now get a second chance. Roethlisberger? Have you really redeemed yourself for brutalizing women by winning more games? Really? I find the entire NFL to be morally apprehensible. The way they allow their players, role models for young children, to get away with disgusting personal conduct. As an athlete, celebrity, and role model, what you do with your personal time is also apart of your contract. People are watching you. Kids are watching you.

Basketball? This may offend some, but I think of it more as thugball. Look at the NBA. They're no better than the NFL. Kobe Bryant? And strangely these athletes never seem to learn from one another. Keep your dick in your pants man.

Golf: Aside from being the most boring game on earth, even more boring than baseball: Tiger Woods. Gross. Perhaps if he appeared more like Charlie Sheen and less of a family man I wouldn't be as grossed out. The greatest athlete on earth? Look what he did to his wife. And his children. I do like Phil Mickelson though. Now that is a family man. I still won't watch the most freaking boring game on earth though.

Baseball: What's his face, Yankee dude. ARod. When you're linked to Madonna, you know you're a serious whore. There's more action in ARod's pants than on the baseball field. DiMaggio would be appalled.

Hockey: I don't know anything about hockey. Most of them are young boys who like to pound each other into the penalty box. And then they marry models and become coaches. I wouldn't say class act, but if they're whores, they keep it under wraps. Good job.

Tennis: You've got some spoiled brats on the court that like to pitch a fit to the ref, throw a few rackets around in petulance like Serena Williams. But otherwise these guys are well behaved. They're also European (there's no good Americans in the pros, except for the Williams Sisters, one of which has very bad manners) and the Euro manners take precedence. Federer? A class act. Nadal? Yep. The ATP would be booting asses left and right if somebody were to be harassing women or crashing cars into people's property.

Perhaps it's just me but I can't watch somebody, look at them, and know they're a heinous piece of human being and cheer them on. I just can't. If you're a sorry excuse for a moral being, then you shouldn't be cheered on, no matter how great you are. Because at the end of the day, with all your money and all your fans, you're still a piece of shit.