Delusional Sunday

My tattoo was finished Saturday. I came into the client's office and worked with the new gal I'm training, very pretty girl who does a lot of volunteering for the Leukemia & Lymphoma Society. She invited me to a date auction for the charity and my interest was piqued. A date auction, huh? Never done that before. I'll sell myself for a date for charity. This might be interesting.

Then I left and went to meet the roommie and her crew for dinner. Well I ended up at the wrong restaurant... she forgot to mention the restaurant had a branch in the Haight. I didn't know they had another one outside of the Mission. So I took a cab and went there. And the roommie's honey bunny drove straight to the restaurant on the Mission. Brain fart? LOL! I had a fantastic time and definitely over-imbibed. After dinner we ended up at the Thirsty Bear. Somehow I gave my phone number away and in the morning I got a few texts from a dude asking me out. I hope he's cute, but the bar was kinda dark and my memory is slightly fuzzy.

Sunday came and I wanted to play tennis. Texted Jason and he came by, helped me put up a giant portrait over my bed, and then we played some awesome tennis. My game is getting better. However, I'm not good enough to play with Brian yet (and kick his fat ass). That's my goal. Drop some body fat, get really strong, become an awesome tennis player, and kick Brian's mushy ass. I will need Kevin for that. I'd have to play for another 15 years before I can beat Kevin. But Kevin can train me to kick Brian's ass at least. I had a loaded cookie from Brian and gave Jason half of it before we played tennis. I actually played really well after we warmed up. I'm getting there.

Then something weird happened. From across the court Jason started looking rather sexy. Sure, he's gorgeous and physically perfect to me. Tall, lanky, perfect baby blue eyes... But usually it doesn't register to me. For a few disastrous seconds, it hit me. I got turned on by his amazing smile, the way he makes me laugh (very rarely), and I about fell over in panic. Holy shit it was time to go home. I got really hungry by then anyhow, so we went to eat. It started raining and got cold so I wanted Pho. And that's when I found out he's never had Pho before. Ahhh... sanity registered itself and I got annoyed. C'mon, you're almost 30, living in San Francisco and you've never had Pho before? I can always count on Jason to be Jason and annoy the hell out of me. I betcha if he lived in Paris for 10 years he still wouldn't know what Haute Couture is, or have escargot, or know the difference between a Beaujolais and a Bordeaux. He may be older than me, but that boy is a hillbilly through and through. Too bad that hillbilly has the body of a Greek god. Michaelangelo couldn't have chiseled him better.

I talked to Daniela later that night and something hit me (something usually hits me every time I talk to her). Jason's physically perfect for me. Too bad I can't inject a brand new personality in him.... say Brian's personality. Then I'd have the perfect man. We'd play tennis together, create music together, talk tech and hack software together, he'd paint and I'd sketch, play Xbox together, smoke pot together, collect all sorts of gadgets... I'd marry him and live happily ever after. But of course, Brian's just a friend, not to mention emotionally unavailable to any woman... and Brian's fat. Even if Brian were to magically get fit with an 8-pack and we dated, he'd crush my achy breaky heart just like his ex did 6 years ago and rendered him incapable of making a commitment. Jason will never be fat, his genes render him incapable of being anything other than physically perfect. I remember one day Jason's mom showed me baby pictures of him... I practically salivated all over the kitchen counter. Sigh.

Anyhow, the Pho thing woke me up to reality and I beat it after dinner. I came home and did laundry and worked on my room a bit more. All thoughts of a sexy Jason gone with the ether. All thoughts of men were gone too cause I forgot I was supposed to hang out with some guy. Which one I'm still trying to figure out.