Gentlemen

What is the definition of a gentleman?

One definition of gentleman we've seen comes from the handbook of the Virginia Military Institute. The code does not recognize the change in women that has occurred in the past 40 years. The stuff about alcohol is also primeval, but here goes:

"Without a strict observance of the fundamental code of honor, no man, no matter how 'polished,' can be considered a gentleman. The honor of a gentleman demands the inviolability of his word and the incorruptibility of his principles. He is the descendent of the knight, the crusader, he is the defender of the defenseless and the champion of justice -- or he is not a gentleman.

"A gentleman does not discuss his family affairs in public or with acquaintances;

"Does not go to a lady's house if he is affected by alcohol. He is temperate in the use of alcohol;

"Does not lose his temper nor exhibit anger, fear, hate, embarrassment, ardor or hilarity in public;

"Does not hail a lady from a club window;

"Never discusses the merits or demerits of a lady;

"Does not mention names, exactly as he avoids the mention of what things cost;

"Does not borrow money from a friend, except in dire need. Money borrowed is a debt of honor and must be repaid as promptly as possible. Debts incurred by a deceased parent, brother, sister or grown child are assumed by honorable men as a debt of honor;

"Does not display his wealth, money or possessions;

"Does not put his manners on and off, whether in the club or in a ballroom. He treats people with courtesy, no matter what their social positions may be;

"Does not slap strangers on the back nor so much as lay a finger on a lady;

"Does not 'lick the boots of those above him' nor 'kick the face of those below him on the social ladder';

"Does not take advantage of another's helplessness or ignorance and assumes that no gentleman will take advantage of him;

"A gentleman respects the reserves of others but demands that others respect those which are his;

"A gentleman can become what he wills to be..."

Not bad. On the other hand, we've heard a gentleman described as a man who supports his weight on his elbow.

~~~ The Playboy Advisor~~~~